g-stockstudio / iStock / thinkstock.com
Men and Women have shared beds for a long, long time but it hasn’t always been easy. Some of us sleep easier than others and there the trouble begins.
Size Matters
Oh when you’re young and in love you could probably share a hammock and be happy. That scenario unfortunately, only works in the movies. In real life? Not so much. When The Wife and I first got married she had a King-sized waterbed. I hated the thing and she loved it, so we compromised and kept it. Then we moved into a new place and the frame fell apart—I swear I had nothing, or little, to do with that—so we went shopping for a new bed. I wanted a smaller bed since the new bedroom wasn’t very big and I was tired of scooting sideways between the bed and the wall. She wanted to stay with a King; so we compromised and got a King.
The Pillow Paradox
We have about sixteen pillows on the bed but I’m only allowed to use two of them. What’s with that? She says the other ones are decorative pillows and not suited for everyday use. How do you think she would react if I said the wine bottles in our wine rack are decorative bottles and not for everyday use? You’re right, it wouldn’t be pretty. The problem is I need lots of pillows and tend to grab whatever I need when sleeping. This doesn’t go over too well at say
3:00am; so ladies, give us some pillows we can use okay?
Put it to Bed
So we compromised on the King size, but there is still the firm versus soft mattress issue. While there is the so called “Sleep Number” bed where I assume you can adjust each side to a different firmness, we used a more sensible approach. She wanted a soft pillow-top type mattress and I prefer a hard firm bed. I’m sure a lot of couples have this dilemma but if you act as adults and work things out for both of you, you too can have a soft pillow-top mattress like me.
Temperatures Rising
We used to have a sheet, a blanket, and a down comforter—she would be bundled in all of them while I either pushed them aside or sweated like an Indian at the sweat lodge. Then the change we don’t talk about came. Without going in to too many details, because for one I still don’t understand them all, she now barely covers herself with a sheet. I on the other hand learned to love that down comforter and could use it on any but the very hottest summer nights. Since she had the Change we don’t talk about we agreed to compromise and now sleep with just a sheet.
The Sounds of Silence
Nobody admits to snoring but how would you know; you’re asleep. I have a friend whose snoring is so bad he has woken to his wife straddling his chest with both hands wringing his neck. I really worry about that guy. His wife has thrown bottles and other dangerous objects at him
for years until they finally got separate bedrooms. There are numerous devices, techniques, and even surgeries that will help this dilemma but my buddy refuses to try. I’m thinking he doesn’t really want to sleep with her anyway. In my case, I prefer sleeping with my wife, but I guess the deep guttural snores have become a problem. She says drinking alcohol makes it even worse but I’ve found when I’m drinking, her snoring isn’t near as annoying.
Bedtime Rituals
Most couples have a hard time going to sleep when one likes to watch TV, one likes to read, or when one or the other just wants lights out and call it a night. I’ve always enjoyed watching TV in bed but she doesn’t. So, yep, you guessed it, we compromised and there is no TV in our bedroom. I do have to read to fall asleep, thankfully she has learned to deal with the light. Of course, I’m not allowed to use the overhead or the lamp; I have a little pen light attached to my Kindle but hey, life is full of these little compromises.
