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Waking Up to Good Vibrations

Modern technology makes it easier for human beings to do just about anything. For example, cell phones enable us to communicate with anyone in the world in an instant; with the quickest contraption out there, we can brew coffee in under three minutes; and now, women everywhere can choose to use an alarm clock that’s sure to wake you up with a buzzing unlike any other.

Disclaimer for the shy, easily-embarrassed or uncomfortable-with-sex-articles among us: this post is about exactly what you think it is: a vibrator.

For one, this alarm clock, aptly named Wake-Up Vibe, wakes you up by using your sense of touch, rather than sound. Here’s how it works, via The Daily Mail:

You programme the clock to wake you up at the desired hour, choose one of six different ‘vibrating patterns’, position the gizmo in your pants – and then wait. Come morning, the subdued buzzing emanating from your nether regions will be the only indication it’s time to wake up.”

The product website offers up enough information to go off of (though not much more),┬áincluding that the Wake-Up vibe comes in an array of different colors with a singular guarantee: “Waking up has never been so much fun.” And whichever color you go with, the product promises high durability, as well as easy maintenance. It allows users to choose from six levels of vibrations with an “intuitive display,” and promises to be easy to use for customizing your new wake-up ritual.

Want to know if this is truly the way to forever wake up on the right side of the bed? There’s only one way to find out.

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