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Man Bags: Why We Don’t Carry a Purse

Men. We have gym bags, duffle bags, shaving kits, and even fanny bags if need be to carry our stuff. The difference is we don’t feel the need to carry all that stuff around, all the time.

Gym Bags
I have a gym bag I use to carry my work-out clothes, swim suit, and shaving kit into the locker room at the local gym. After returning home, I dump the bag in my closet, hopefully after remembering to toss the sweaty clothes in the dirty clothes hamper. I feel no need to carry this stuff around with me all day so I have a bag just for that. We like to have separate bags for separate functions, maybe just so we can keep track of what’s what. I’m sure most women’s purses are organized and neat so you know exactly what’s in them, right?

Shaving Kits
We men have shaving kits that contain all the essentials we need to make us presentable; they don’t always work but we try. Mine contains things like a razor and shaving cream, deodorant, soap, shampoo, toothpaste, and a toothbrush. That pretty much covers it. We bring these on trips and maybe to the gym, but then it stays at home. Of course, if we carried this stuff around everywhere we went, maybe we would smell a little better, a little more often.

Backpacks
Both men and women use backpacks to carry around stuff these day, but this is the closest we get to a purse, while still feeling manly. You can carry just about anything in a backpack and nobody thinks twice about it. Try carrying your gym cloths in a purse into the Men’s locker room and you may get some looks but a backpack is acceptable anywhere.

It’s a Hygiene Thing
Sure my wife has to carry things I don’t use like makeup and other feminine products I’d rather not even think about, much less discuss here, but it goes way beyond that. I used to carry a comb in my back pocket but that’s about it for personal hygiene. She has Chap Stick, eye-drops, a little container of aspirin, and probably a triage kit worthy of a battlefield medic. I figure she could field dress a battle wound, fix her makeup, mend a torn sleeve, and replace a lost button just by reaching into one side of her purse. If I want to repair a torn sleeve or replace a missing button I would just, well, let’s face it, that’ll never happen.

Change Anyone?
I used to worry because The Wife never works out. It’s not that she needs to, I just worry for health reasons. Well, after attempting to move her purse I realized she lifts weights every day, probably more than I do at the gym. Most of the weight is from coinage, though I can’t be sure because I never would even think to look in there. I dump my change into a bowl on my dresser every day. When the bowl fills, I have a big gallon bottle that I toss the change into, saving it for a couple years until it’s worth taking to the bank. She, on the other hand, has probably 5 years’ worth of change in that purse. That thing is so heavy it could be classified as a deadly weapon.

Fanny Bags Are Not Man Purses
I do carry a fanny bag around occasionally but never do I actually wear it around my waist; that would be tacky. I do have one usually in my car that holds my change my wallet, sunglasses, cell phone… anything I don’t want in my pockets. That doesn’t make it a purse and just by adding “Man” if front of purse does not make it any more acceptable. It’s a Man-bag and as long as you don’t wear it around your waste or heaven forbid, over your shoulder, it is not a purse.

The Real Reason Men Don’t Carry Purses
Can you just imagine what we men would carry around all day with us if we did use purses: beer, definitely beer, and maybe tools too. Not lots of tools but at least a hammer, a screwdriver, some pliers, vice-grips, and maybe a drill. Oh and food, lots of food. See, it really is a good idea men don’t carry purses.

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